Funny words beginning with H

A Harrison

A code name for a boy when you don't want anyone else to know who you're talking about
submitted by Keera CULLEN

H.A.R.F

Half Ass Retarded F**ker
submitted by missinghim14

H.B.S

Hungry Bum Syndrome, when your arse eats your knickers
submitted by BB

H.H

Holy Hell
submitted by Hirgon

H2Hoe

Group of think-their-too-nice girls who should be locked in a tower and drowned!
submitted by ruth

Habberplabb

Exclamation of frustration
submitted by Owen Davies

Habberplabb

Exclamation of frustration
submitted by Sophia P.

Hack/Hacking

When your trying to figure something out.
submitted by Tim

Hacky

Happy and wacky
submitted by khumo..sweet stuff rampa

Haddock Pasty

A Lady's 'Axe Wound' with special reference to it's odour.
submitted by Danny the Fanny

HAG

Hot Ass Girl
submitted by berkeley

Hag Nipple

A person with screwed up nipples
submitted by warren

Haggard

Messed up or incredibly cool
submitted by random hero

Haha...Good one, me neither.

When you say something that doesn't make sense, say this phrase to change the subject.
submitted by J to the Mizzeel

Haints

Scary homeless person
submitted by Tator bob

hair gremlin

Getting a haircut / haircutter
submitted by luke

Hairy Pairy Quite Contrairy

A bald person
submitted by Jamie Parr

Hairyolas

The remarkable (and dick-shriveling) feature of hair around the pigmented area around a woman's nipples
submitted by Keith Schneider

Halfwit

Not right in the head
submitted by meegann

Ham Wallet

Another word for a vagina
submitted by Homies

Hamburger

The arrangement of one's tesicles and shaft so it takes on the apparence of a hamburger
submitted by RMD

Hamburgler

Someone who prefers fattys for sex
submitted by Ty

Hamflap

A flappy vagina
submitted by Peeloy Vargas

Hammed

Drunk to the point you're hilarious
submitted by Twisty

Hammered

Really wasted, drunk
submitted by Leelee

Hamokash

Help
submitted by mohammad

Hams

Man Boobs
submitted by tyler

Hand-to-Gland Combat

A vigorous masturbation session.

Handitard

To be so retarded, it handicaps your ability to function
submitted by Ty

Handsome

One who masturbates a lot or masturbation (like twosome, threesome, foursome...)
submitted by dya

Hangaburger

Another word for hamburger
submitted by en

Hank Marvin

Said when you are really hungry (starving)
submitted by MACKY

Happy Vest

Straight jacket to a crazy person
submitted by Catherine

Haquioktaha

A noise you make whilst mimicing a pig
submitted by rawwrstfu

Hard Glass

A promise that will not be broken
submitted by cozza cha

Haregu

Sexy girl
submitted by wedi belay

Harmon

To undress another man with your eyes, or to radiate extreme gayness
submitted by fuzz

Harpoon Lounge

To say when leaving a place
submitted by lopster wrestler

Harry monk

Another term for gentlemans relish
submitted by shirin

Hasbian

A woman that used to be gay
submitted by ddotcom

Hatchet wound

Camel toe
submitted by Jimmy Boy

Hawaiian Hot Box

To smoke weed in a bathroom while running hot water from the shower
submitted by Bri*

He-Bitch Man-Whore

Male Prostitute
submitted by El Stumpo

He-bitch-man-slap

An incredibly camp man's slap, or used as a threat ie "Don't make me He-bitch-man-slap you!"
submitted by Lizzie and Sarah

He-she-man-bitch

You don't know if someone looks like a man or a woman
submitted by anon

Head

The name you call a person who is being their dorky selves and its a greeting. Like for example: "Hey, how are you doing head?"
submitted by bobo

Head!

Funny shaped Head
submitted by Aaron

Headuparseitis

Someone suffering from this disease is said to have their own head that far up their own arse that it must be permenant.
submitted by Sugarmumma

Healthy

A really good looking person whos not overweight or underweight and sexy!!
submitted by jade

Heart

Someone who never gives up and tries really hard ie "What a heart!"
submitted by Stuart

Heavy-Duty Judy

A fat woman-hence, heavy duty
submitted by Britter (again)

Heblew

Gay jewish language
submitted by suddam hussein

Heebler

A person doing strange things all alone in the dark
submitted by Flinker

Heffa

Someone who is faaatttt!!!!!!
submitted by lemon

Heffer

Really fat girl or a pregnant cow
submitted by pilly

Heinshit

Ugly
submitted by Savvi

Helium Heels

Someone whose legs go up easily...
submitted by Jacques Liebenberg

Hella

Super, a vastly large amount. ex. That hella sucks
submitted by Robby

Helladank/Hellatight

Supremely awesome or cool like cheeseburgers to a fat guy.
submitted by bob

Hellbaby

Hot girl
submitted by hellbaby4eva

Helmet for your little astronaut

A condom
submitted by KennyM!

Hench

Big. ie "That gold chain is hench!"
submitted by Drew

Henry

As in Henry the eighth, 'I picked up a henry tonight'
submitted by Ninety

Herb

Someone who is so outrageously out of style with whatever is normal. ex. a room of goths, a hippie. the 'herb' would be the hippie.
submitted by Brittany of kentucky (i do wear shoes)

Herchan

Lots of many/plural
submitted by natjesusdude

Here's your sign!

When someone does or says something completely stupid, this is the reply you should come up with. Inspired by the Travis Tritt song of the same name.
submitted by Kurasu

Hermaphroditishlike

Describing something extremely gay or lebionic: eg. "Those stupid telemarketers are hermaphroditishlike"
submitted by St. Charles, The Unlikely Bastard

Hermtarded

Half retarded, half hermafrodite
submitted by KP

Hero Sandwich

A Giant Idiot
submitted by 4lyf

Herpaganaciphilitis

Herpes, Gonorrhea, and Syphilis
submitted by Matt

Herpaghonasyphilitis

A combination of Sexually Transmitted Diseases; One Dirty Ho
submitted by ExquisiteRage

Hershey Squirts

When you fart so hard sh*t comes out
submitted by nohershey

Hershey-squirt

It means you have got crap in your pants
submitted by Kerry n Vinnie

Hev

Heavenly
submitted by MBD

Hexleflux

A state of confusion- i.e- "I'm in a hexleflux"
submitted by tom

Heyss

Safe - respect - cheers!!!!
submitted by Martin

HFFA

Hot From Far Away
submitted by anonymous

hibida-jibida

When you bust ass on a trampoline and then you fly up in the air and hibida-jibida is the word you scream when you're in the air shouting uncontrolably
submitted by ryan stanley

Hicklypups

hiccups
submitted by von

Hid

Hideous
submitted by MBD

High horse

Overconfident and think your better then everyone. “He should get off his high horse”
submitted by Chead kosta

High owl-itution of the Oztuhpeedious

Upset Stomache
submitted by Grandma Norma Jean

Hilare

Abbreviated "hilarious"
submitted by irishmissie

Himglish

Man speech
submitted by kayleigh

Hinkydinky

A Penis
submitted by I'm not telling

Hip to the Jive

Anything that you find cool or awesome
submitted by Katie

Hipples

Hairy nipples.
submitted by ted

Hippocrocadillopig

The lowest score in the order of rating girls.
submitted by Kingjellybean

Hippodogacrocomooseapig

FUGLY ol chav slapper
submitted by prince willie

Hippopotomonstrosesquipidaliophobia

Fear of long words
submitted by flannipherious

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia

The fear of long words.
submitted by Your Mother

Hispanisize

To think lusty thoughts about hot Latinas
submitted by Terry

Hissilicious

Great, fun to be with. My 5yr old came up with it!!
submitted by two texts

Hit and Miss

The act of going to urinate or piss
submitted by sprogg daddy

Hizzle Mc Fizzle

Nose
submitted by Jon Aston, Walsall

Ho Butt

dirty person (usually sporting a mutlet) and is going nowhere in life
submitted by gorgio

Hoares Bath

To only wash your face, armpits and vagina
submitted by Polly

Hoarkin' the Swazy

To do with oral
submitted by turd furgesen

Hoax Poke

To air f**k something
submitted by Ty

Hoba

Female hobo
submitted by maemae

Hobbledehoy

The awkward stage between a boy and a man.
submitted by i'm in a tizzy!

Hoblab Cockian

Used when a man says the wrong thing at the wrong time making him a d**k head
submitted by NELL

Hoburger

An unclean girls privates
submitted by nemisis

Hoe

The cheaper alternative to going on a date
submitted by Kev

Hoebag

An unattractive prostitute
submitted by chris

Hoebag

Prostitute
submitted by Dandunne has cahonnes

Hoebo

Refers to your everyday girl who dresses all thotty and whatever, whilst repping big name brands like the salvation army and kmart. So in conclusion a hoebo is just a poor lassie trying to look good on a budget meant to buy a single loaf of bread
submitted by He Who Must Not Be Named

Hoedown

In the hood it means your sister is dead
submitted by KennyM!

Hog Roast

Fat girls who think they are dead sexy
submitted by pudwaa

Hoga

Weird!
submitted by nerissa

Hogo

A stink. Use it as "What a hogo..." (Actual word that rarely anyone uses anymore)
submitted by Tally

Hogwarts

An STD you develope from watching too much Harry Potter
submitted by KennyM! MitchM!

Hogwash

Nonsense
submitted by Sean

Hoikenschlager!

Geez! Oh my God!
submitted by Kat Blomquist

Hojax

To punk someone, or to punk yourself
submitted by Sherrie

Holacalhatchi

Holy cow
submitted by zachary

Holla!

Used as a "ghetto" term, meaning "indeed", or "yes, i agree!"
submitted by ADAMS APPLE

Holler

"Usually said to member of opposite sex as in, "Hey baby, I just want to holler at you." Meant as term of endearment....it's like saying "Hey cutie, I want to get with you."
submitted by Emily

Hollow Wood

No Brains
submitted by Robert M. Hensel

Holocaust Child

Someone who is so skinny you can see their bones
submitted by killer kookiez

Holy Guacamole

When you are shocked say it
submitted by chris

Holy Sh*t Premiere Package

The best ever
submitted by jbob

Holy shark bandanas

Holy sh*t!
submitted by Courtney

Holy Shiz Nips!

Holy crap!
submitted by bumblebee

Holy Testicle Tuesday

Say that when you see something messed up or off the wall or someone really ugly
submitted by Tyler ZombieFyd McCain

Holybejoinkers

It means Cool, or awsome, or anything you want it to
submitted by Js & Ks

Homanahow

To fully appreciate something. for example: "omanahow this cookie is delicious"
submitted by the moo crew

Home-made Hotdogs

Putting your weiner in a woman's buns
submitted by hey its franklin12

Home-skillet

Cool person
submitted by louie

Home-Slice

A really bad gangsta word for a person
submitted by bikerballs

Homeslice

A really lame homie, friend
submitted by ilsnob

Homeslice

A good mate. e.g. "Ma homeslices were hanging at my house!"
submitted by chazz

Homophonic

Original a term a music. As you can guess this version means someone or something that sounds gay.
submitted by JustB3N

Homosapienophobe

In reference to every sad soul on The Internet who constantly insist that they are all introverts who turn down plans like every other second and hate the human race, who hate people, whilst secretly yearning for a single friend and calling out to god every day in the sheer hopes that someone will take pity on them and invite them to their own backyard
submitted by begone ye stalker who dare ask for knowledge of my name

Honk

To throw up.
submitted by Philip Fosdyck

Honk

When you see something really disgusting and it makes you want to be sick you say, 'it made me Honk'
submitted by lube-in-a-tube manchester x

Hoo Tang

A Tang Party
submitted by Robert M. Hensel

Hoo-rah Henry's and Their Unicorns

Those annoying upper-class t**ts who parade around in Mercs and laugh about how rich they are- and you aren't. They have unicorns because they're sooooo much special-er than us mere mortals. Bastards.
submitted by Kirsty

Hoochie

A sluty girl or a whore
submitted by b-rad

Hood Rat

Ghetto girl
submitted by bre

Hoodrat

A townie or lower person, commonly spotted sporting a hooded top.
submitted by SteveDave

Hoofy Gid

A girl or Woman kissing other girls or Women
submitted by Kade

Hooley

A real boring person!!
submitted by woodzy

Hooper

A very hot woman
submitted by Housty

Hoopti

A ghetto or broke-down car
submitted by Kiko tha freeko

Hooshavitsa

It is alternative way of cussing in a different language
submitted by THE PIPE

Hooty Scream!

A very funny funny Person
submitted by Hooty 1, 2 ,3 , 4, 5

Hoover girl

Someone who sucks hard!
submitted by Lib

Hopspankula

The tiny heart attack you get when you slip on ice...
submitted by BJ

Horizontal Polka

Sex
submitted by OliviaSulkinz

Hornswaggle

To confuse someone. Bamboozle.
submitted by Tommygun

Horrendufied

Adjective to describe how drunk someone is (eg "he was horrendufied last night")
submitted by absgtcd

Hosible

Hospital
submitted by brianna

Hoss

Cowboy Slang: Hoss can be used to replace words such as dude, man, buddy, bro, etc.
submitted by Jimi Hughes

Hot box

To smoke weed in a van and get everyone high off the second hand smoke
submitted by the A-TRAIN

Hot Carl

To take a dump on one's mouth/face/forehead.
submitted by bongos

Hot Rodney

Getting head from a girl while taking a sh*t at the same time
submitted by SDeB

Hotbox

F*#kin hot chick
submitted by Ben G

Hotdog

To insult, speaking low of
submitted by BmKbomberman

Hotdog

You say it when you want to change the subject randomly
submitted by kathie

Hovis

Someone that is fat and has rolls
submitted by seratian

Hovised

When someone has a head shaped like a loaf of bread.
submitted by Lauren-May and Gemmer-Louise

How's your father?

Refers to the state of your penis as it is the father of your children
submitted by TML

How she doobie????

A phrase used to greet another - in replacement of "Hi, how are you?"!
submitted by Marta

Hoxinated

Hot and you know it
submitted by bobby

Hublahjenkins

To shout out when you are extremely happy, random, or pissed off. Is for the main use of happy and randomness. Is the awesomest crazed word around!
submitted by Faith Huffman

Hudubuwah?

Pronounced "Huh-duh-buh-wah?" Response when someone says something confusing and strange.
submitted by Morc the Orc

Huffer Crocker Moose

An expression used by me and my dad to describe fat, ugly women
submitted by [email protected] ADDME

Huffer Moose

An expression used by me and my dad to describe fat women
submitted by [email protected] ADDME

Huggum

Dried up blood in your nose
submitted by KennyM!

Hulabaloo

Noisy
submitted by Eloise

Humanoid

Someone who is not existing or answering you. Example: if you text someone and they dont respond like they usualy do, you respond "Humanoid..."
submitted by bobo

Humm-Ding-In

Really Smelly Individual
submitted by Jack Logan

Humpadge

Same as 'Knobadge' but with the girl on top
submitted by von

Humpologist

One who majored in the study of humping
submitted by USSJAnge

Humvintage

Old fashioned, German, sexual intercourse.
submitted by Badger Goil

Hunda

Stupid. eg. 'he was being all hunda' or if someone had a stupid idea and you wanted them to stop explaining it to you, you would shout "HUNDA HUNDA!"
submitted by Josh

Hunga Punga

Getting done up the arse by a 6 foot black man (The '6 foot' isnt his height)
submitted by Dan

Hungry humper

A fat nimphomaniac
submitted by dean, amy , claire

Hungry Pants

A constant wedgie where it looks like your ass is trying to eat your pants
submitted by NotoriusTee

Hunk-a-blunk-a-whoo

Wow!
submitted by anna

Hurtin' for a Squirtin'

A slut who is desperate to get laid
submitted by jmonahizzle

Husamoboba

Its kinda like when your annoied because no one will listen to you, you say really loud "HUSAMOBOBA" and they usually go quite. HUS-A-MO-BO-BAY
submitted by Axel

Hutchnelpsnot

A fat chick who wears her clothes way too tight
submitted by jesus

Hwunnie

Another word for something going badly e.g "you have had a hwunnie"
submitted by Ed Gauntlett

Hymnglu

Phone
submitted by Nobogal

Hypocolozerflozer

A person below all other people(hypo) who hangs out with some lozers (colozer) who is a lozer himself (flozer)
submitted by lish

The horizontal vomit fountain

To lay on your back and chunder everywhere
submitted by El Stumpo